Lately I’ve been having massive mood swings so I went to the Doctor to ask about the ‘M’ word, that’s the equivalent of the ‘F’ word to women over the age of forty five, menopause to you.
Sometimes I feel like I’m wading through really dark places where my children aren’t my own after all but spawn of Satan, and Peter is the Devil incarnate. Where, I am sure it would be more fun playing in a pit of snakes than going through my usual daily routine.
Don’t get me wrong I don’t feel like that all the time, sometimes I feel as though anything is possible and that tomorrow I’ll wake up to discover my blog has become a major success and two publishers are beating down my door for that first book I know I have in me. Oh yeah, and there are blue birds circling my head and tulips spring up as I walk by.
I felt sure that I must be smack bang in the middle of menopause. A blood test showed that my levels were all fairly normal. My testosterone was minutely less than it should be which, is a sign that I am on the cusp of being peri menopausal.
The peri menopausal phase can last anywhere from two to ten years, oh joy! The symptoms can be: mood changes, insomnia, fatigue and memory problems. Well HELLO! I can pinpoint the start of my memory problems to the day I gave birth to Molly. Nothing new there, unless it gets worse then I think I may be headed for oblivion. Mood changes they say, what I’m experiencing are not what I’d classify as ‘changes’. More like bloody great revolutionary overthrows. Insomnia I can probably deal with as I’ve been sleep deprived for most of Molly and Lulu’s lives, so what’s another 5 or ten years? The same goes for fatigue. In fact I probably won’t even notice that one. There is also the possibility of weight gain, loss of hair, dry skin, all this and heaven too what more could a girl want.
Where to from here? I’m not really sure. I need to have another conversation with my doctor to see if there is something I can do to minimise the size of the mood swings, the rest is manageable at the moment. I exercise regularly, eat well and try to keep on top of things. I don’t berate myself too much if I’m not having a good day. I try hard to bite my tongue or walk away if something is getting on my nerves.
I have a long way to go so I am sure I will be posting here again about by progress. Meanwhile this old trout needs to go and play with some snakes.