Age, it’s that bastard that marches on at its own pace despite all the hard work you do trying to slow it down.
I turned fifty years old last weekend. Now don’t start feeling sorry for me. I’m doing enough crying into my Drambuie for the both of us and for what it’s worth I’m in good company. These women also turn fifty this year; Sheryl Crow, Jodie Foster, Marcia Cross and Paula Abdul.
I am not trying to compare myself to these super-hot females. I mean I’ll bet not one of them have picked their kids up still in track pants not having even so much as glanced in a mirror since brushing their teeth that morning. Even my daughters have commented on my unique hair styles and not in a “Gosh your hair looks fab” kind of way, more of a “Gosh look at your hair!” kind of way.
There is hope though. If I look half as good as any of these for females I’ll be pleased.
I’m not about to be hobbling along on sore knees in my comfy flat lace-ups to join the blue rinse brigade just yet, but there is a lot more work involved in trying to look and feel great. Exercise, diet, drinking plenty of water, these things are now far more important than they ever were.
Some of the downsides to turning fifty have to be:
- Flabby upper arms, lifting your arm to wave at someone can be downright dangerous.
- Putting eye make up on has never been so difficult. My first problem is seeing my eye to do the job secondly once the mascara is on I need to be careful until it dries so that it won’t smudge on the ever increasing eye overhang.
- I can’t read anything without my glasses. A trip to the supermarket without glasses is a nightmare. They have a large-print book section at the library, why can’t they have large print ingredient labels.
- Losing things. I am constantly going to the supermarket without my glasses because I simply can’t find where I put them down. Those chains you put round your neck for glasses just scream “I’m getting too old to remember where I put my glasses so I need this goddam ugly chain to keep them on” to me. Who needs anymore reminders?
Some of the upsides:
- When I do finally peek in the mirror it’s difficult to see the ravages of time because I can’t find my damn glasses.
- A different perspective on life. Things that once would have been important and taken up a great deal of time and stress are now just blips.
So in the main I am O.K. with my age. There is a nice sort of smugness I feel when I see singles out dating or couples having their first child. I’ve been there done that and am happy to pass the baton. Just remember this:
“Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.” ~ Daniel Francois Esprit Auber